Changing Immigration Status Part 3

There are some things I remember very well. I can throughly describe to you my three- story childhood home in Cleveland Heights, Ohio, the sourness of the cherry tree in the front, the sweetness of the tomatoes in the backyard and all the names of our neighbors (Celia, Jahanuka, and Jalonika, Tameka, Becky C, and Jason S). That was back in 1984 and yet it is hard for me to recall some details between 2008 and 2012, like how we found out about a lawyer who would actually take our case. It may have come as a referal from one of our friends. Whatever it was, it changed our lives.

When we met our new lawyer in person she explained the process in detail. We had form after form after form to fill out (and how I hate paper work!) We had to remember all of Enrique's former addresses and the dates he had entered the States. She warned us that the most challenging aspect of his case was that he had reentered the States illegally more than once. We explained the reason (how his girlfriend--the one he had planned to marry--had notified him that she was dying of cancer.) and that the risk was worth it to him, he would have never forgive himself had he not said goodbye. We were upfront about everything as she told us a lie could prevent us from getting a visa and he could end up with a ten year ban or longer.

It took us about two years to get all the paper work together and we got a visa appointment. One thing I remember clearly is being in our lawyer's office as she looked at us and said, "The wait might be long, but you're young and have your whole lives ahead of you." I nodded but in my head I was thinking that it wouldn't take long, she was wrong. We had three young boys at that point, Enrique had never had any problems (no drugs, DUIs, nothing) and everyone loved him. Most importantly, I was a citizen. Had I known how relevant the lawyer's words really were I don't think I would have let him go.

We said goodbye to Enrique at our Michigan house since his brother was driving him to the airport. It wasn't a sad goodbye because the boys and I had plans to spend the summer in Mexico. I thought for sure that by the time the boys an I returned in August, Enrique would have his papers. I was wrong. The first few weeks of our summer in Muna, Mexico were sweet. We stayed with his kind-hearted grandmother, Enelia, who was thrilled to have the grandchild she raised back home. Enrique rode through his town with baby Alan on his bike, visiting the fruit and vegetable market and stopping to talk to all his old friends. It was wonderful to be in Mexico for the very first time as a family (all other times it had just been me or me and the kids).

Then, towards the end of summer, Enrique had his first appointment in Ciudad Juarez. He was denied. I was crushed. We would not go back together. I would go back to the States with the boys and wait. That's what I did. I waited until he got his second appointment about six months later and we waited more time to discover he was denied a second time.

Each day I woke up early, drank a cup of bitter black coffee, went to my long term sub job, went to class to get my teaching certification in the late afternoon and went home to cook dinner for the boys. I had little appetite and I didn't realize it at the time but the whole process was taking a tole on my health and I ended up losing twenty five pounds and looked "guanty" according to my sister when she visited a year later. We were still waiting.

The third appointment took a while to get and when that was denied, I lost all hope. I started thinking of alternatives like moving to Canada. I remember mentioning this to my pastor. We had started meeting together at a coffee shop for prayer and he could see how much I was falling apart. But he told me to be patient and wait on God. There are so many other things that happend during this time: everything in the house seemed to be breaking down, I was overwhelmed with work and school, and parenting on my own. My mother helped a lot but it wasn't the same and she couldn't fix things in the house. Enrique had always fixed everything. I earned less than Enrique had too. My community group started helping where they could and I would have never been able to get by without all the ways they blessed my family. Still, to this day I don't know how we managed to make car payments and house payments each month. Enrique sent almost all of the seventy-five dollars he earned each week and lived off of black beans for the sake of his American family.

We started the school year of 2013 certain that it would end the same way, without Enrique. This time I was wrong in a good way. In November 2013, I had gone to Meijer's and before we left Alan who was one month from turning three, asked to go on the mechanical horse. No sooner had I dropped the penny into the slot than my phone rang. It was Enrique. I still cry when I remember how he said, "We got what we've been waiting for." I waited, afraid to be so hopeful and guess incorrectly. He continued, "I was approved." That's when I started to cry, right there in the store. No news had. ever been sweeter.

Since we had already waited nearly two years, we decided that he would go to California first and work until Christmas in order to save up a little. Christmas day 2013, in the midst of a terrible ice storm that left half the city without electricty, I let the boys open the biggest present they had ever seen. The box stood five feet tall and was about three feet wide. Sergio, Sammy, and Alan started ripping at the paper when I suddenly flipped over the bottomless box to reveal what was inside. Enrique had snuck in without them seeing and Sergio and Sammy squealed as they realized their father was home at last.

Sometimes life gives us challenges we'd rather not have. I would have loved it had Enrique gotten his papers as easily as his brother. If God had asked if I'd rather skip the sorrow of an unkown future, the struggle of being a single mom, the financial turmoil among other things, I would have given a resounding, "Yes, please!" But sometimes we need the struggle to truely appreciate what's on the other side. I will never take Enrique's status, now a citizen as of June 2023, for granted. It also changed our hearts and we decided to grown our family, welcoming Enelia in 2016. Ultimately everything happens for a reason and a harder road can mean greater blessings.